Teaching Your Children How to Deal with Bullies
64Teaching your child how to deal with bullies is very difficult. Not only this, but it is so frustrating to see them in pain, as well. With new technologies comes new methods of bullying, and these days its more vicious than ever. Many parents go through absolute anguish because a lot of the old methods don't work anymore!
I guess you could still call me a child myself. In the past I have been bullied quite frequently, and in fact, its still happening. But it doesn't bother me anymore. I've learnt to deal. And so here is a "child's" perspective on teaching your child to deal with bullies.
Ignoring.
I know we've all said it. Many people roll their eyes at it. But the truth is, once you master it, ignoring is a great defensive tool against bullies. I have done, and it makes a world of difference.
Think happy thoughts...
Like the My Chemical Romance song "Headfirst for Halos", just think happy thoughts. Heck, you can even sing it in your head if you know the lyrics - singing it out loud may bring on further bullying. I sound so corny to myself right now, but happy places are perfect. When I withdraw into mine, I don't know someone's picking on me.
Write letters.
If your child finds that the bully is getting to be too much for them, get them to write a letter. Of course, its never going to be sent. This allows your child to release their bad feelings. The letter may include how the bullying makes them feel, say what they want to do in retaliation, and even swear at the silly bullie [if you allow swearing in your household].
Just leave it be.
You know the saying "What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger"? Well its proved true with me. Often you have to let your child develop their own defensive techniques. Only then will you be assured that your child is fully protected from the dangers of society's bullies.
Credit of this hub has to go to my Mum - for teaching me these techniques.
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Do you have jackets? thanks alot for the comment, I know its all been said a million times but there's nothing else you can do.
I liked this one, good job
All very good advice. I'm very much an advocate of the ignoring concept. Though I do recall there was this one kid who used to tease the heck out of me, and called me Devil Boy incessantly because of a face I made once—I could be a bit of a class clown. I ignored the kid, and he was just one of those kids who wouldn't let up no matter what. Finally one day on the bus I just had had enough, and I remember turning around, looked at him in the meanest, coldest way I possibly could, and said with every bit of seriousness, "If you really thought that I was the devil, are you SURE you'd want to screw with me?"
I did make use of another, less polite word than "screw" of course. But I have to tell you, the kid's face went white. No lie. I kid you not. He never spoke a single word to me ever again. Never. I think, if nothing else, he paused to think about that one.
Yeah, what if? :)
Very nice hub.
How to you go about teaching year 1 or grade 1 child about class bully? My boy just joined a new school and has been punched by this same boy smaller size than him numerous times. He loves to have more friends and has a very compassionate heart. I have been telling him to avoid this boy but it is not working and to ignore him too.
Please advise and help.
Really great advice. A good offense is a great defense as they say.
hey Kai's mum
Just tell the headmaster remove the kid from the school or tell your kid to notify other kids he has been bulling and all kids attack him. That would embarrass him
Great hub; however, ignoring bullies DO NOT work. In fact, bullies interpret this as you being scared of them and they will continue their insidious behavior. The only tactic to deal with a bully is to go to his/her inane, primitive level and fight fire with fire. Bullies are unevolved Neanderthals who only understand brute force.
I shall make an analogy of World War II when the German soldiers invaded Russia. Nazi Germany was the bully and Russia was the victim. Russia incurred many losses; however, she decided that she was NOT going to take it anymore and decided to attack back. She went to Germany's level and practiced an eye for an eye. She kept fighting until she won the war. Nazi Germany underestimated Russia believing her to be inferior; however, Nazi Germany proved to be the inferior one. Russia gave as good and/or better than she got. This is the lesson which victims must give to bullies.
Bullying is very common in today’s times and seems to be on the rise. This is a major parenting challenge for parents of victims of bullying. Parents or Guardians should learn to identify if your child is being bullied and how to help him/her. Feel empowered to assist your child because you will have practical tools and guidance and observe your child flourish as he/she feels understood and protected. I would like to share this link, about a service on how to protect your children. Check it out it's interesting: http://safekidzone.com/
WebSpeak Ezine 4 years ago
Well, welcome to the VOB, Victim of Bullies, club. I have heard your advice before but it is always good to hear it again.